Holding Space for Failure

She was young, feisty, confident and all of 14. Rare traits in young people that come from adversity. She shone through the first two days of the camp like she belonged here. The nurturing environment fueled her creative confidence and helped her achieve new milestones. Her learning edge was challenged and she always loved a good challenge. 

Day 3 is usually a Youth Led Day at camp where young people are encouraged to lead workshops for their peers. She signed up to lead an art workshop. Known for her discipline, she prepared well. She had thought through her workshop, played it over many times in her head. She felt confident and was positive that she will sail through. 

The workshop tanked. She lost her confidence when she fumbled through her instructions. She struggled with some steps and it became all chaotic and messy. She lost her composure and just about managed to complete the allotted time. However, she saw something strange. No one left her workshop or abandoned her. No one sneered at her. Her peers, whom she didn't know well, held space for her and for her failure. 

Post the workshop, she cried and poured her heart out. She had never felt so much support before, definitely not when she had failed. She had grown up in an environment where success was expected of her. Being a girl, she had to fight harder to earn success and each success brought with it pressure to perform better. She didn't realize, she was holding herself back from being her best because she had become too scared to fail. There was no support for failures in her environment. 

Yet here, she had failed and no one had abandoned her. She realized she had permission to fail and in her failure she had achieved the biggest success of her life. She had learnt to not let failure destroy her. Her peers ensured that failure gave her strength. They held space for her to fail. Her tears were tears of joy and realization. She had a transformative life experience. 

According to Heather Plett, "Holding Space means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. When we hold space for other people, we open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgement and control."

This young woman experienced the power of Holding Space when she was going through her journey and it helped her discover things that she had no permission to feel before. This young woman is the embodiment of the power that each of us holds within us as human beings - the power to be empathetic towards ourselves and others.

The outdoor experiential camps at Dream a Dream use the Life Skills Approach to help young people transform and discover their true potential. One of the core tenets of these camps is to Hold Space for young people as they go through her personal journeys and discoveries. Since 2002, thousands of young people have discovered their confidence, resilience, empathy, creativity through these outdoor experiential camps.